Bottoms Up! City Council: Drinks are on us

Proposal to turn government business into Happy Hour

In a stunning turn of events, the Lincoln City City Council has applied for a limited beer and wine license to serve drinks during Council meetings at City Hall.

According to the Oregon Liquor Control Commission application submitted last week for a limited on-premises liquor sales license, the Council wrote: "We recognize how excruciatingly boring City Council meetings can be and believe that a glass or two of wine or beer just might encourage more people to attend."

Included in the application packet was a redesign of the Council Chamber floor plan that would replace the area now occupied by the city recorder and city attorney with a karaoke stage.

One city employee, who asked not to be identified, said: "That is the most boring area in the entire city, so anything that can be done to liven things up seems OK by me."

Included in the plan would be an area for darts and shuffleboard near the entrance to the Chamber. When questioned about whether an increase in noise might distract the Council, a councilor noted, "Well, we rarely listen anyway, so what difference would it make?"

Another addition under consideration would be to make use of the City's cable access channel to introduce a "Kiss Cam" that has proven popular at sporting events.

"While we won't expect much participation from the Council, we hope that those in attendance will have some fun," camera assistant Jesse Snogginton said. 

The application includes a request to partner with the local casino to bring Keno action to the closed-circuit television in the gallery.